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In the beggining

I've just started this journal today and will spend all of my spare time updated this and trying to live up to Ashley's expectations. Ashley is my big brother and (as you will know if you've read my brief autobiography) I idolize him. All my life all I've ever wanted was for him to be a proper big brother, but he's always distanced himself from me, so why do I idolize him? All the small (yet significant) details I've learned about him have made me come to realize how interesting and thought out his life is. He's always known exactly what he wanted to do with his life and he has done it or is going to do it. He's always done more than he has to and always has to make sure that he is right. He says I'll never be like him, and I think that he doesn't want me to be like him, he's embarrassed of me. and so I want to do everything within my power to reach his expectations. That or reach my own expectations then I will feel so happy and so proud with myself that I won't want to be like Ashley because I'll be happy with who I am.

Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
allsorts46
Apr. 1st, 2004 11:59 am (UTC)
That's all very nice... but I think you're crazy :-P

You're better off doing you own thing I think, but stick around here and update, it's interesting. I like this place.
tentuxius
Apr. 18th, 2004 12:04 pm (UTC)
You're married to this place...
You're married to this place Ashley, I sware it ! lol
allsorts46
Apr. 18th, 2004 12:06 pm (UTC)
Re: You're married to this place...
Nono, I am teh singles
tentuxius
Apr. 18th, 2004 12:08 pm (UTC)
Re: You're married to this place...
Shall I inform Shanna of this fact?
allsorts46
Apr. 18th, 2004 12:09 pm (UTC)
Re: You're married to this place...
If you liek
tentuxius
Apr. 18th, 2004 12:07 pm (UTC)
Well, hmm...
I used to idolize my sister lots when I was younger - always got a lot more praise for good work, always got good marks - top sets for a number of subjects in secondary school. Well I never thought I could surpass her or get anywhere near her status' but I soon found all it took was a bit of deadication and for one thing I definately decided that its better doing things for yourself than anyone else.

Having said that if there's someone to be proud of it's your brother. So if your gonna idolize anyone it should be him.
vicstaroonie
May. 6th, 2004 01:45 pm (UTC)
ummm
Thanks...I think
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )